Cohabitation: Balancing Love, Legalities and Practicality

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Living with the love of your life is one of life’s greatest joys. However, it also brings several challenges. Cohabitation may be quite taxing on both parties since there are many legalities and practicalities to take care of. 

Cohabitation refers to living with any other person, such as a relative or friend. However, the legal definition of cohabitation is an arrangement where two individuals live together as spouses or unmarried partners, depending on the context. 

Cohabitating is similar to a common law partnership, though such arrangements are more recognized in Canada and the UK. America does recognize cohabitation agreements as a legal contract that binds couples living together, even without marriage or alimony. 

Cohabitation Advantages and Disadvantages

Many people contemplate cohabitating, but moving in with your significant other is a big decision that should take time and consideration. Here are the different advantages and disadvantages of cohabitation.

Financial Impact

Cohabitation is often viewed as an opportunity to test the waters of marriage since you get to fund your living space and expenses together. It provides a positive financial impact since everything from rental payments to utility bills is divided by two.

Sharing money eases the burden, but some couples may feel uncomfortable. These misunderstandings contribute to future arguments. If they decide to split, it can raise questions about who carries on the financial burden of keeping the property.

Emotional Effects

Cohabitation means closing the gap with your partner. People who value physical touch, quality time, and acts of service benefit from being nearby, as you get the reassurance you need to keep going through the day.

Unfortunately, proximity also means being exposed to your partner’s lows. Negative emotions are hard to handle daily. About 3% of happily married Americans live in separate households, though most cohabitate even before the wedding. 

Lifestyle Changes

Lifestyles are bound to change when cohabitating. Sometimes, it may be for the better. Maybe you’re eating and hydrating more consistently because of your partner. You could also get quality exercise and sleep by leaning on your other half.

However, lifestyle changes depend on the nature of your significant other’s habits. For example, cleaning up messes around the house is subtle but definitive. If they seem to drink alcohol regularly, smoke cigarettes, or gamble, it can also create a more negative impact. 

Legal Considerations

Cohabitation means being in close quarters with one another, but legal aspects like property rights and financial arrangements are a gray area. Who gets the home if one passes away? What happens if one gets into debt?

A cohabitation agreement is a great way to address those necessary topics. You can also invest time in making a power of attorney to give your cohabitating partner more authority. 

Property Rights

Property rights refer to the owner who can possess, transfer, or sell the home. In cohabitation law, living together means you do not have those shared rights over your home together. However, you can indicate in a contract that you and your partner have those assets.

Giving both parties property rights through a cohabitation agreement gives an equal voice on what happens to the property throughout the relationship, as well as if it ends. They can also specify whether one person would inherit the estate if the other dies in a will. 

Financial Arrangements

A cohabitation agreement should also explain the financial arrangement between the two people who live together. Most couples have a spoken discussion, but having the terms of who pays what in writing is good legal evidence and protection. 

You can also specify how bank accounts are shared or separated. If you or your partner are close to retirement, would you share the funds together? If a partner financially supports an aging family member, is the other also responsible for contributing?

Power of Attorney

Cohabitating partners typically cannot answer for you legally since they have not undergone marriage. However, you can draft a power of attorney to authorize another person to make important decisions on your behalf. Entrust medical and financial decisions when you’re incapacitated. 

Remember that state laws vary when recognizing a durable power of attorney for health care and financial arrangements. Discuss these rights with a lawyer to ensure that you grant your partner these capabilities. 

Practical Preparation for Cohabitation

Cohabitation requires so much attention, especially at the beginning of the endeavor as there are many aspects to prepare for. Starting strong can help you minimize misunderstandings and maintain a healthy relationship when you live together.

Legal Paperwork

With so many legal considerations, you and your cohabitation partner should both be involved in completing paperwork and working together with an attorney. When buying a property or creating a power of attorney, pay attention to what’s written on the paper. Work as a team to nail the terms according to your own spoken agreement.

Financial Planning

Financial planning is also a big part of the discussion before cohabitating. Many people experience mental and emotional stress because of misunderstandings about money. Discuss your expectations and ensure you and your partner are safe from that. You should also get the terms in writing for future reference. 

Chore Delegation

Living together means sharing responsibilities. Unfortunately, about 49% of married couples with kindergarten-age children fight over chores. Every cohabitation family needs to figure out how to delegate these tasks, even if there are no kids in the picture. You can split the list in half or have shifts throughout the week. 

Conflict Resolution

Even with the perfect cohabitation setup, fights are still inevitable. Some could be as small as leaving dishes unwashed, but others like missing the rental payment are much bigger. Couples need to learn how to be open and transparent with one another. 

Discuss how you want to handle conflicts in the future. You can settle everything within the day or give one another time to cool off before returning to the discussion. 

Division and Decoration

As you share the same household, it’s essential to narrow down what rooms are common areas and which are more exclusive territory. Especially in a smaller household, you should still be able to indicate where your belongings go and where you can go for some alone time.

Along with room division is decoration duty. After all, you need to maintain individuality. Losing your authenticity is a sign of a codependent relationship and can lead to resentment. Have separate corners to express yourselves. 

Commit to Cohabitation

Cohabitation is a fulfilling yet challenging commitment. To get off to a good start, you and your partner must balance the love, legalities, and practicalities of the situation. Consistent work and determination are also two key factors in maintaining the arrangement.